The end of February
I used to have a dream when I was a child. I dreamt that the objects were getting smaller, that the walls of the room were shrinking, making the effect of being in a very big place, and then everything got far, and it seemed even tinier. I used to be in the middle of the room, desperately looking around, trying to stop that change, that movement. And then I used to feel so insignificant. Normally I was not able to distinguish reality and dream. That is what happens with good fantasies. That was the time I was stuck thinking that human beings are nothing and that the world is so big that I make no difference on it. I am somehow still on that point. I also used to worry a lot about money and work, I asked my mum almost every day what would happen if dad would lose his job. My mind, always lost in the future, making plans, trying to control everything, trying to avoid to live the present, because I was not so important for worth it. How could I survive to this? I guess because I didn’t